Broken Wings
by YoursXxXTruly
Summary: Ryuichi left to America for three years, but before he left, he confessed his feelings for Tohma...who rejected him. But now he's back. What will the synth player have to say to him?


Disclaimer: I do not own Gravitation or any of its characters, but I wish I did.

Title: Broken

Description: When Sakuma Ryuichi left for his American tour, he left behind the person most dear to him, Seguchi Tohma, his long-time friend and musical partner. But just before he left, he informed the older man of his love for him…and was rejected. Now he's back, but how will Tohma respond to the fact that he's no longer the hyperactive musician he once knew?

"It's good to see you, Ryuichi." Tohma smiled softly at the younger musician, holding back tears. In truth, he had missed him. A lot. And worse yet was that he had come to realize that he really did love him in return, he just hadn't known at the time when it had mattered most.

"Mr. Seguchi." Ryuichi nodded, bowing slightly, and turned to his manager. "Mr. K, I believe you have something for him?"

"Good to see you, Tohma." K pulled a letter from his pocket, untangling the violet ribbon that was wrapped around it. The envelope was a pale yellow, meaning that it probably wasn't all that new.

"I'll get back to the studio on my own." Ryuichi walked out silently, though K didn't follow—not that he had expected him to. If him and Seguchi were friends, they surely had catching up to do.

It was a few minutes before Tohma found the courage to open the letter. He did so slowly, tears filling his eyes as they traveled down the paper.

_Dear Mr. Seguchi,_

_I believe it is best we come into contact as little as possible. It has only been a couple of days since I confessed my feelings to you, but I think in three years, I will be broken. I am already torn, in heart and soul, and I am emotionally scarred. However, I have yet to be broken—you will know this has happened when I am no longer the cheerful boy you once knew. When life has no meaning to me. When my fragile mask finally breaks, and everyone sees me for what I truly am._

_Please do not feel bad, Seguchi Tohma. Especially after I tell you this…by the time you finish this letter, I will be gone. I will have left on my own, to the studio…and I will be waiting for you in your office. But be warned—I most likely won't be breathing._

_You were my everything. My love, my life, my breath and my death… And I will love you forever._

_Yours forever,_

_Sakuma Ryuichi_

"K! We need to go, now!" Tohma cried, tears running down his face.

"What is it, Mr. President?" K asked curiously. He didn't appear very worried—but then again, why should he be? Knowing Ryuichi, K didn't have the slightest clue what the contents of the letter were.

"Just go!"

Ryuichi sat on the floor of Tohma's office, tears flowing down his face. In one hand, he held a razor blade, and in the other, a picture of Tohma. Getting slowly to his feet, he turned the radio on to his favorite Nittle Grasper song, concentrating especially hard on Tohma's keyboard sounds. Bringing the razor to his wrist, he slid it across with skill—this obviously wasn't his first time. He had been depressed for some time now.

He considered taking pills, so that when he finally slashed for good, it wouldn't be as painful. However, thinking about the letter to Tohma, he decided against it—he deserved the pain, especially since he had made the man he loved feel miserable.

Hopefully Tohma wouldn't kill himself.

Ryuichi took a deep breath and drove the blade into his wrist. He gasped with pain and winced horribly before falling on his face. Blood ran down his arm and he cried out in pain, driving the blade into his other arm. Sweat and blood spattered his face, which lie on the cold floor. Mustering all of his remaining strength, he softly murmured his lover's name.

"Tohma…"

The door to the office flew open and Tohma dove in, tears pouring down his face. He pulled Ryuichi into his arms, sobbing into his chest. "Ryuichi! No, no…this can't be happening! Ryuichi, please, say something!"

The singer's eyes opened slightly, and he whispered, "I love you, Tohma… You are…my everything…"

"I love you too! Please, don't die, Ryuichi! Please…" Tohma choked over his tears, stroking Ryuichi's hair.

"Don't…cry. Not…for me…" Ryuichi pulled Tohma's face too his own weakly and kissed him, then fell still.

Tohma sat in near-silence for at least an hour, sobbing quietly. By the time he finally got the strength to move, it was only to lift the blade from the younger man's hand. "I'm coming, Ryuichi… I broke you, so now…it's time for me to pay." Laying a gentle kiss on his lover's lips, he dragged the knife across his own wrists and soon was no more than a lifeless corpse.


End file.
